Could you be married to someone with extreme opposite views

[divinnole]

My wife and I are the perfect example of opposites attract. She is so OCD it drives me crazy and I am about as opposite in the other way as possible. Through the years though I have found I need a little OCD in my life and she has found she needs to lighten up in some areas. Outdoor activities has been my life with boating and diving top of the list. She could not even swim when we first met. Later she became a certified diver, not to the extremes I am but she does enjoy diving, snorkeling, scalloping, fishing and such. I have learned I enjoy going to art galleries (not the high end stuff but more of the local galleries) Also have learn to like theater, again more of the community type and not necessarily the big productions.
However in our core beliefs and values we share a great deal in common, our faith, our political views, but I am more extreme than she is, and our favorite college team.

I work with a guy who he and his wife have absolutely nothing in common. Race is the most noticeable thing with him black and her white. She is absolutely far left on her political beliefs and he is about as right wing as I am. If she were younger and near where all the demonstrations are taking place she would be right there with the antifa nitwits.
He wears a MAGA hat and she can't stand Trump. He loves the NOLES and she hates BB and all things NOLE and is a um fan. She goes to church with him but disagrees with all the preacher says. He was talking about her and her views this morning. He said her views are getting more and more extreme all the time to the point it is causing strife in the marriage.

It got me thinking about differences in a spouse and if I could be married to someone so opposite. Like with my wife I could handle some personality differences, in fact I think it is a good thing. However I know I could not would not be married to someone with a complete polar opposite values and beliefs that I have. The list of things that would be a no go for me is : Religious beliefs with her being an atheist, her having far left political views, being total jerk gate of cane fan.

Race, job, casual uf or um fan, or slight differences in views would not be deal breakers but the others would be a no go for me.

Could you be married to someone who is completely opposite of you in your core values?

 

[Spearhead04]

Have fun with, yes. Married, no.

 

[F4Gary]

I agree with you Divin. I could not be married to someone like your friend's wife.

 

[Dr. Nole]

I would imagine it would be hard to marry someone as you describe who had completely opposite views as me...I wonder if that was the case above or one of their views "changed" after they were married?

 

[divinnole]

Dr. He said she has always been more moderate to slightly left than he is, but the Obama years made her more liberal and the Trump years has sent her over the edge. He is from Chicago and had family in the political circles there. He has absolutely no use for Obama and is a Trump supporter. So not a real pleasant household right now.

 

[Scalphunter]

I couldn't do it. But it seems to work for these two folks who have been married forever and are on the national stage:

As well as this pro Trump and never Trump couple:

 

[SoddyNole]

I think it was in movie Wag the Dog where the political consultants couldn't care less about politics and never voted. I get the feeling this was art imitating life and would not be surprised if they had James Carvell and Mary Matalin in mind.

My grandfather was a career military Republican and my grandmother was a Mississippi blue dog Democrat who were married 50+ years until their passing. She would call Reagan ole shoe polish due to him dyeing his hair and my grandfather would ignore her and pour himself a bourbon. I'm most confident the booze was the secret to their marriage surviving all those years.

 

[GwinnettNole]

Great topic. I was actually going to ask something similar: "does anyone with their significant other cancel each other out with their voting?". I've become more moderate the past 10 years or so. My wife is still pretty conservative. We both go to church, agree on helping people in need, ways of raising our kids, etc. If you can believe this I actually became more moderate by two things: 1) My faith in God 2) Being a soccer fan and meeting people with different experiences.

We are more than likely not voting for the same person for president next month. My parents also were very different politically. My dad is a democrat and my mom was a republican. I know this a cliche but all that is needed is respect. I could care less who my wife votes for, as long as we can respect each others opinions.

 

[OHNole43123]

In answer to your question, No.

 

[DesotoNole95]

Not a chance I’d be married to a person(woman) with the views of the husband that you described.

 

[ChiefWB]

No way I could be married to a person who thinks either side has everything figured out.

 

[nynole1]

I couldn't, religion and beliefs too important for me and how we raise our children.

 

[nole71911]

I don’t even have Republican friends, let alone being married to one. I’ll definitely pass. I am atheist but I could be married to a religious person, I just wouldn’t partake in that part of their life.

 

[supergreennole]

I'm black, wife is white

I'm liberal, she is conservative

I'm an IT nerd, she is a hair and beauty specialist

But, I tend to focus on the things we have in common more than the things we don't, every situation is different.

 

[Renegadenole]

My parents were total opposites.
Mom - a bible toting republican with strong conservative views.
Dad - a hell raising hard drinking democrat, very anti establishment of big business etc

They often didn’t vote because they just canceled one another out. They also divorced after 53 years of marriage. Dad passed away last year. Was a wild marriage but they mostly made it work.

 

[EveryoneBleedsGarnet]

I'm a right wing Libertarian (votes Republican) and my wife is a Brazilian immigrant member of the green party (votes Democrat). She's mostly concerned about the environment and I'm mostly concerned about gun rights and the government staying out of my business. We are both grown adults that realize other people are allowed to have their own opinions so we don't have any problems over it.

 

[MIKE_G]

Depends on the subject we're in disagreement on more than the party affiliation. Some issues I don't get that riled up on just because I may have a different opinion. Others I wouldn't want to be around the person let alone be married to her.

 

[Spenser1]

My wife and I are the perfect example of opposites attract. She is so OCD it drives me crazy and I am about as opposite in the other way as possible. Through the years though I have found I need a little OCD in my life and she has found she needs to lighten up in some areas. Outdoor activities has been my life with boating and diving top of the list. She could not even swim when we first met. Later she became a certified diver, not to the extremes I am but she does enjoy diving, snorkeling, scalloping, fishing and such. I have learned I enjoy going to art galleries (not the high end stuff but more of the local galleries) Also have learn to like theater, again more of the community type and not necessarily the big productions.
However in our core beliefs and values we share a great deal in common, our faith, our political views, but I am more extreme than she is, and our favorite college team.

I work with a guy who he and his wife have absolutely nothing in common. Race is the most noticeable thing with him black and her white. She is absolutely far left on her political beliefs and he is about as right wing as I am. If she were younger and near where all the demonstrations are taking place she would be right there with the antifa nitwits.
He wears a MAGA hat and she can't stand Trump. He loves the NOLES and she hates BB and all things NOLE and is a um fan. She goes to church with him but disagrees with all the preacher says. He was talking about her and her views this morning. He said her views are getting more and more extreme all the time to the point it is causing strife in the marriage.

It got me thinking about differences in a spouse and if I could be married to someone so opposite. Like with my wife I could handle some personality differences, in fact I think it is a good thing. However I know I could not would not be married to someone with a complete polar opposite values and beliefs that I have. The list of things that would be a no go for me is : Religious beliefs with her being an atheist, her having far left political views, being total jerk gate of cane fan.

Race, job, casual uf or um fan, or slight differences in views would not be deal breakers but the others would be a no go for me.

Could you be married to someone who is completely opposite of you in your core values?

no. no. no.

 

[Ralnole]

My wife and I are the perfect example of opposites attract. She is so OCD it drives me crazy and I am about as opposite in the other way as possible. Through the years though I have found I need a little OCD in my life and she has found she needs to lighten up in some areas. Outdoor activities has been my life with boating and diving top of the list. She could not even swim when we first met. Later she became a certified diver, not to the extremes I am but she does enjoy diving, snorkeling, scalloping, fishing and such. I have learned I enjoy going to art galleries (not the high end stuff but more of the local galleries) Also have learn to like theater, again more of the community type and not necessarily the big productions.
However in our core beliefs and values we share a great deal in common, our faith, our political views, but I am more extreme than she is, and our favorite college team.

I work with a guy who he and his wife have absolutely nothing in common. Race is the most noticeable thing with him black and her white. She is absolutely far left on her political beliefs and he is about as right wing as I am. If she were younger and near where all the demonstrations are taking place she would be right there with the antifa nitwits.
He wears a MAGA hat and she can't stand Trump. He loves the NOLES and she hates BB and all things NOLE and is a um fan. She goes to church with him but disagrees with all the preacher says. He was talking about her and her views this morning. He said her views are getting more and more extreme all the time to the point it is causing strife in the marriage.

It got me thinking about differences in a spouse and if I could be married to someone so opposite. Like with my wife I could handle some personality differences, in fact I think it is a good thing. However I know I could not would not be married to someone with a complete polar opposite values and beliefs that I have. The list of things that would be a no go for me is : Religious beliefs with her being an atheist, her having far left political views, being total jerk gate of cane fan.

Race, job, casual uf or um fan, or slight differences in views would not be deal breakers but the others would be a no go for me.

Could you be married to someone who is completely opposite of you in your core values?

No way, ever.

 

[divinnole]

I'm a right wing Libertarian (votes Republican) and my wife is a Brazilian immigrant member of the green party (votes Democrat). She's mostly concerned about the environment and I'm mostly concerned about gun rights and the government staying out of my business. We are both grown adults that realize other people are allowed to have their own opinions so we don't have any problems over it.

I am a lot like you on the gun right and limited government. I am a whole like your wife on environmental issues. My wife is somewhere in between on both issues.

 

[buckeyenole]

I couldn't do it. But it seems to work for these two folks who have been married forever and are on the national stage:
As well as this pro Trump and never Trump couple:

Um, this couples' fighting and public acrimony have been making headlines for months. She was Trump's campaign manager and continued as one of his spokespersons. He hated Trump so much he founded the "Lincoln Project" simply to try to destroy Trump. She had to 'leave work and come home' to keep the family together because their teenage daughter went completely over the edge and announced she hated both her parents and so tried to get herself emancipated from both of them! In my view, husband showed complete and utter contempt for his wife for fighting against her reputation and career. There are plenty of Trump-haters. They didn't need one more.

 

[semihawk]

sounds like my best friend's situation

 

[rymoreau]

This whole idea of opposites attract. I don't believe in it. My ex wife and I were as opposite as can be for the most part sans core values etc. It gets old quick. We left each other on bad terms and have two kids together. We are both much happier with like minded spouses.

 

[Seminolejon78]

Political views, doubtful. Matters of faith, absolutely not.

 

[squiffynole]

I can say you need to be careful with the funny sarcastic types because later in life it's not so funny.