South of the Border
- Thread starter PoopandBoogers
- Start date
LOL. South of the Border which could also be a code name for Cafe Risque?
Don't we strive to live in the utophia of a free society with individual choice? At least we use to. And of course not, I don't use those words, I wasn't raised by a pack of wolves!
*No offense to any of those who may have been raised by a pack of wolves. You have beautiful coats, I admire your resiliencey, and your majestical nature.
The simple fact that this thread exists and people are like "how's that still there" is enough to tell you a fairly reasonable person knows these billboards are a bad look and ought to come down.
As for FSU, I'm fully prepared for the day when it dawns on us that 75,000 fans loudly yelling the warchant, screaming "Scalp'em", 10,000 other fans doing the warchant but with middle fingers extended and chants turned into "f' the Seminoles", etc... is a bad look. As of late I've found myself a bit conflicted about doing the warchant, I generally start but after a couple chops my heart isn't in it - so deep down, I know where I stand. When the day comes, I won't fight it.
While I understand your message, I believe that no matter you do, someone, somewhere is going to be offended. You can't please everyone.
Honestly, it's not that hard not to offend folks.
I try to be attuned to my words and actions, their meanings (perceived or actual), and how other other people react to them - it's all subconscious, I'm not even trying. If I get the sense that I said something that might have bothered someone, I either apologize or just try to be better next time.
It's legit almost never been a problem for me. Being decent is rather easy - takes zero time and effort.
Then ask yourself, based on your personal code, why--solely for you--it's not ok to say some offensive words, but ok to say other offensive words.
No one is advocating to arrest you for using words. And I find that the "utopia of a free society" is something that only exists in Ayn Rand's books. You can be an azzhat--there are many in our world--but i try to live by the rule of "don't be an azzhat"
Being self-aware is key.
But who decides for a group what is and isn't offensive when the group is split on the issue?
There is no split. There are offensive words. People that that fall on the "I'm not PC" excuse, simply are rationalizing that there is a scale of offensiveness. N-word be a 10 and something the person would no use; but "stop being gay" or "that's retarded" is a mere 3 and a line that is ok to cross.
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I like being offended. Sometimes its needed, sometimes it puts me in my place, gives me pause and humility. It also makes me learn and also makes me laugh, a lot. Eddie Murphy was a funny, straight shooting offensive sob and I loved it. We have to lighten up and laugh at ourselves and others sometimes.
Being purposely demeaning, degrading or humiliating to someone is a whole different animal than being offended.
Being purposely demeaning, degrading or humiliating to someone is a whole different animal than being offended.
If you're in a group and that group is split, don't use a term that that would offend a member of that group. It really isn't as complicated as you're trying to make it.
Err on the side of decency.
"Groups" aren't just some monolith. Basic, rational, thoughtful decency should keep you out of trouble.
Not really sure what the point of this Q&A session is. My answers are almost always going to be "try to be decent", "be considerate", "politely apologize", and "try to be better"
They're simple words b/c it's a simple concept.
What if the Seminole Tribe of Florida is split on whether allowing FSU to continue using it's traditions and Chief Osceola as a symbol?
I agree with this. Obvious racial or homophobic slurs should clearly be frowned upon by society in every situation but “b***h”? My question to Ostrich is do you not use curse words at all even when hanging with the fellas at the bar? If so, I’d argue the “f word” is more offensive to more people than the b word. How bout “GD”? Probably a lot of church going folks who are offended by that. I guess I subscribe more to the notion that people could use thicker skin in life and a stranger using some offensive language in a bar or similar establishment isn’t something to get upset about. Of course in a professional setting or at a place where family’s and kids are cursing of any kind is tacky in my opinion.
In this case, an apology really isn't necessary. You could have said, Feather, not dot, and it would have sufficed.
The Seminole Tribe of Florida has already come out in support of FSU. The Seminole Tribe of Oklahoma is in opposition. If I'm sitting in a room with both, I would do nothing to offend our friends from the west.
Yeah I know that about the two tribes but that didn't answer my question. What if the Seminole Tribe of Florida were split?
I'm not speaking for Ostrich but I don't curse even when hanging out with the fellas. I made a conscious decision to stop when my daughter was born 28 years ago. I'm not necessarily offended when someone curses around me in the proper place and time. I am if their language shows a lack of awareness and respect. Offended might be the wrong word. It's more embarrassed for them and their lack of sophistication.
Then I think the university should stop whatever the one side finds offensive. The only way FSU has kept their name and tradition was because of the support of the Florida Tribe. Lose that and the university loses its protection.
I try to only curse when I'm reciting one of my favorite rap songs and have the lyrics memorized. I do this alone in the car as I sit in traffic with my doors locked.
It would not affect me if FSU changed mascots. And I suspect that members of the Seminole Tribe of Florida are split on FSU's use of the imagery. We do not own Chief Osceola and the Seminole imagery. I appreciate that the school elected to be accurate and not make a cartoonish character out of Chief Osceola (see. Chief Wahoo or the Redskins). But if you step back and think about it, it's kind of messed up that a school that didn't integrate until the 1960's appropriated a native american as its mascot.
Swearing is like being naked. While there is an appropriate time and place, that place is almost never in front of strangers or children. Too many people forget that these days.
No chance he could say now what he said then, kind of like All in the Family and Married with Children.
Totally agree. Exiting the military I had to tone it done a couple degrees. Having kids is even harder to all but remove from my daily vocabulary. But sometimes a good explicative laced tirade is cathartic. In the correct company obviously.
He (they) can say it. People just may no longer find humor in it because its based on old and stale stereotypes.
You can use the B-word if you want. I decided I’m better than using a word built on demeaning and reducing women, regardless of circumstance. I don’t throw around GD either, even tho I’m atheist I’m not out here trying to offend believers.
I’ve got enough words in my brain to avoid using those things.
Folks having or not having thicker skin just seems to be an excuse for other folks to get away with being thoughtless or abrasive if you ask me.
Also noticed that you frown on “obvious racial or homophobic slurs”, so what about the nonobvious incidious terms and slurs? Those get a pass?
Should have been “obviously”.
What you call being “better than” feels like just being really uptight. If I was hanging with a bunch of buddies and someone used that word and another guy looked at him and said “you’re better than that” I’d never stop laughing. I can’t recall ever calling a woman that word but joking around with some friends? To each their own but saying you’re “better than that” is amusing.
I swear regularly and with vigor - just not in front of my kids or strangers. Or in the office.
Yep. I have gotten fired up at work a couple of times and really came close but have not. First one in my work group of 10 to drop the f-bomb was a grandmother. I couldn't quit giggling. I just like knowing I have a little wiggle room if I ever slip up.
Oh you caught me saying I try to be decent and it’s not hard.
What point are you trying to prove other than laughing about semantics?
You do you.
By the standard I hold myself to, which isn’t crazy high, I’m better than that. Totally cool if others don’t hold themselves to that standard, they’re free to. I’m also free to point it out (tho I generally don’t)
I’d also like to think that if you thought one of your friends was doing something wrong, they’d respect you enough to hear you say it without acting childish. If you don’t think there’s anything wrong with that word, that’s your choice. Free country. Most guys might agree. If you care about the women in your life you should ask them if they do.
This thread, every time it pops up, goes nowhere. Some people want the elbow room to say stuff they know is hurtful while claiming they didn’t mean to offend anyone, hiding behind “I can’t be perfect so why bother.” If that’s your fetish have at it.
Even though I work out of an office, it is not a professional one in the traditional sense. It is primarily composed of people in the highway construction field along with financial and administrative support. We had a new surveyor join us about a year ago. As far as I know, he only knew one of the engineers personally. Starting day one, his casual conversations were filled with F-bombs and not just in private conversations but also in group settings. The guy is almost 60 years old and owned his own company for many years so he was accustomed to working with clients and had to know what was/wasn't acceptable within an office setting. I did make a comment to him during one of the group meetings about curtailing his language in the presence of the ladies in the office. Someone else must've taken it further because his vocabulary has definitely changed. I don't understand how some folks can be so unaware.
I laughed at the contradiction, not semantics.
Unexpected contradiction is key to a lot of humor.
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